Basically you are now talking pitch, not slogan.
Don’t become a Hepatitis C statistic. Get treated with affordable generic medication and rediscover what it feels like to be well again.
This is phrased in the classic “Problem statement, followed by solution statement”
What is missing is the call to action (CTA). Now you have the readers attention what do you want to do with it? This should be the last part – in essence a request to do something.
The CTA could be
Google for “generic hep c medication” to find the facts.
In some ways this is better than say “Visit http://fixhepc.com to find out more” because it draws the person in and presents them with a good range of options.
Don’t become a Hepatitis C statistic. Get treated with affordable generic medication and rediscover what it feels like to be well again. Google for “generic hep c medication” to find the facts.
3 sentences, each with a specific purpose. Short and to the point.
This basic formula
PROBLEM STATEMENT
SOLUTION STATEMENT (with benefits)
CALL TO ACTION
Is the standard recipe for a pitch. On the (with benefits) people want benefits, companies produce products with features. You sell benefits, not features.
To pad it out you could use power words like “Imagine” working it into a benefit statement
Imagine how good you will feel to be free of Hep C.
And you could add informational bits and raise questions such as:
Generic medications are identical copies of effective medicines, but carry a far lower price tag. In a world where half of all HIV patients take generics, why is it that not even 1% of the 180 million HCV patients worldwide been able to access the new miracle cures?
And nothing says you can’t have 2 calls to action. Shares on social media more or less double if you just flat out ask people to do it.
Sharing this post could save someone’s life so please help us spread the word and share this with your friends.
So the longer version might read:
Don’t become a Hepatitis C statistic. Get treated with affordable generic medication and rediscover what it feels like to be well again. Generic medications are identical copies of effective medicines, but carry a far lower price tag. In a world where half of all HIV patients take generics, why is it that less than 1% of the 180 million HCV patients worldwide been able to access the new miracle cures? Imagine how good you will feel to be free of Hep C. Google for “generic hep c medication” to find the facts. Sharing this post could save someone’s life, so please help spread the word and share this with your friends
some benefits. Good luck 
